The least, of the least of these……

Day 3 at Chenzhou

Hot

Humid

the smell…if you have ever been to China you know what I mean

Hard beds

Warm drinks…no ice and no cold drinks

People everywhere

CRAZY driving

Sick kids with green snot running out of their noses and onto you

KIds grabbing at you and anything that is yours

Severe special needs kids rocking back and forth or drooling or grunting

Babies that are blue

Babies that weigh 4 lbs

Dirty clothes

smelly kids

Bodily secretions on you

Little bodies filled with scars, scratches, bruises and sores

Heart-ache that wakes you up in the middle of the night

Little dirty faces that haunt you

Praying these dirty little faces fight for life

The feeling of overwhelming helplessness

Missing your brown-eyed babies….and blue -eyed boy at home….tremendously

But…….knowing God has placed you here, amidst all of this, and feeling HIs presence as you pray over them and for them

Wanting to be nowhere else at the moment

Day 2

I am having a hard time using words-I am not usually at a loss for words :-). There are just so many emotions running through me and I can't seem to sort them out. Hope. I wanted to concentrate on my verse: Jer. 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future…..it is so hard to see the hope for these kids. We played outside with the older kids the first part of the day. These are kids that will never be adopted due to severe special needs or kids not available for adoption. There are 3 or 4 "healthy" older kids in the bunch. They are precious but they need to be adopted and given a chance. The rest of them, break my heart. Even something as simple as drawing with chalk was a challenge for some. They cling to any bit of attention shown to them and some cry when you have to walk away momentarily. The sweet, sensitive ones get taken advantage by the more aggressive ones and it is so hard to watch. Julia held and played with a little boy named Ray today. He looks like a little old man. He is frail and oh so thin and so sensitive and sweet. He just wants to be loved. I would take him home in a second.



Then we went back after lunch and spent the afternoon with the babies. I held 2 babies that together weighed less than one of my bio babies. The first was a little down syndrome girl that looked to be about 4 lbs. We put a clean new outfit on her and she looked better…..but oh so tiny. She seemed to be struggling to breathe. After trying to get her some stimulation, I rocked her to sleep and placed her back in her crib next to her "friend". This is a bilateral cleft baby that also looked about 4lbs. We put a new outfit on her and it made me cringe to see her frail skin and bones body. Her leg was the size of my finger. She is quite alert and enjoyed walking around and being out of the crib. I got to feed her and I made sure she drank it all. She too fell asleep in my arms. As I held these little girls, I prayed for them, told them Jesus loved them and that He did have a hope for them. I gave both of them a good talking to and told them they had to fight. I made them promise not to give up…ever! I pray they make it. Julia took care of a little heart baby that was blue. I mean BLUE. I noticed that when she picked her up she turned as if to breast feed. She is also quite plump for a heart baby. I asked and they said she was brought in about a month ago! She desperately needs heart surgery. I am sure her mother wanted to keep her but couldn't afford the surgery so she left her there. SHe wanted to give her a chance to survive. She loved her enough to give her away so she had hope. Please Lord let this child get the surgery she needs!



So how do I make all of "this" make sense? How do I just leave these babies and kids here? How do I go back to my cushy life in America where I complain about the DUMBEST things????? Will these babies I/we held, rocked and played with even live? Will sweet little Ray get his toy taken away if Julia isn't there to defend him? Will the 14 year girl I thought was a boy cry silent tears and pinch herself over and over again because she is frightened? I simply held her hands and smiled at her and she looked into my eyes and stopped. What will happen to her? Oh the sad reality that is their lives. As you celebrate the 4th of July and freedom today please don't take for granted the blessings we Americans have. And please pray for these kids that don't have what we have. Pray for hope.

Day 1 at the orphanage

Hard. Sad. Overwhelming. Hopelessness. Helplessness. All words that describe today. Hug your children a little tighter. Be thankful for the blessings you have.Thank God you are family. Then please pray for those that don't have family. The orphans. The children we were with today. They are real. Real kids without. Real kids with special needs, medical issues, needing life saving surgeries, needing most of all….. love. And hope. I prayed over them today. Little people with such sadness in their souls, who smile when you hold their hands….and then don't want to let go. It is such a BIG problem where do you start. You give what you can and God multiplies it. Please Lord let me love big and give big these next 2 weeks and please multiply my humble gift.

travel day….or days!

So we left our house Sunday June 30th at 9:00 a.m. and we arrived Tuesday July 2nd at 9:00pm…so literally 48 hours of travel. All flights enroute to Beijing were on time, smooth, landed ahead of schedule and besides the momentary loss of power on runway and ridiculously small seats (think commuter jet size-how I envy those of you who can fly 1st class!) all flights were good. We arrived in Beijing almost an hour ahead of schedule, located our 1 checked bag, exchanged some money, found the airport dayrooms-rooms like a mini hotel that you rent by the hour-checked in there and took showers, bushed our teeth and climbed into the ever so familiar HARD beds for a short nite of sleep. We woke up found a Starbucks-woohoo-in the airport, navigated the shuttle to a different terminal, mind you this was miles away by shuttle bus, went to check in for our final flight to Guangzhou and meet up with our group. We must have looked lost or dumb or overwhelmed but whatever the cause we had a nice gentleman walk us to a counter and help us. He handed our boarding passes and passports over to the clerk and quickly they were handed back. Flight cancelled he said! Ok panic set in. Tried to text our team leader to see where they were, didn't work, about to turn on my phone to call and be charged an arm and a leg for intl roaming rates, when Julia heard her name…..woohooo! There they were all 10 of them in their Visiting Orphans t-shirts! Another God-sent nice man helped us all get reticketed for a later flight. Then a bit of a travel nightmare ensued and people were shuttled between terminals looking for luggage, rechecking in, going thru security again, plane delayed and finally all 12 of us boarded onto the plane to Guangzhou. We then met our guide when we landed for the 2 weeks, hearded ourselves and all our luggage, minus the 4 lost bags, onto a bus, and then a high speed train. You have 2 minutes to board this train…12 people and oh….. 30-40 bags and MANY Chinese people, who are known for shoving just a little all onto said train in 2 minutes. We made it and no casualties. Smooth 1 hr ride to Chenzhou where we were greeted by the orphanage director, asst. director and one of the nannies. All smiles!!!! We took a bus to our hotel, headed to KFC for a quick and late dinner and then to shower and bed! Ahhhhhh sleep! It was a LONG 48 hrs!!!!!! But the good news is, when you are that tired you sleep well! And that we did. Julia and I both slept about 7 hrs straight without being awakened by jet-lag. Ready to begin our 1st day at the orphanage….that post about our 1st day will follow later. This is going to be hard!!!!



Pictures from our 48 hours of travel and first night at Chenzhou!

48 hours later!!!!

We made it to Chenzhou exactly 48 hours after we left our home Sunday morning!!!! Oh my!!!! To say we are wiped out is an understatement. Some travel snafus and lost luggage for our group but overall everything is good! The director, asst. director and "head" nanny, I guess you would call her, met us at the train station and then walked to KFC with us for dinner. More tomorrow I am exhausted but oh so happy to be here!!!!!! Got to go to bed now I am dizzy from lack of sleep and brain cells gone! :-) Love to all!

Above the noise

We live in a little enclave of houses on a double cul-de-sac set back from a fairly busy street. When we looked at the lot years ago one thing stuck out. Just next door was a church. And with that church came church bells. As we contemplated purchasing it, praying through it, I heard the bells. I knew right then and there it was ours. We used money my sweet grandmother, who had passed away before this, had given us to make the down payment. I believed she would have loved the bells. She was an inspiration to me in my faith journey growing up. She always had a little devotion or two laying next to her bed on her nightstand. And her faith was simple but real. A treasured memory for me. Back to the bells...... I enjoy sitting out on our back porch each morning having my quiet time. I get up early and the busy road which runs behind our backyard is quiet at the early hour. As time advances, the cars start to move and the noise builds. This morning as I sat enjoying the still cool air and reflecting and praying about our upcoming mission trip, I heard the bells. I knew it was God confirming and reassuring. I closed my eyes and listened to each chime. Some were loud and clear...and then a car would go by and all but drown out the bells. If I listened very carefully, I could still FAINTLY hear them. They were there, just hard to hear. And it was good.

How often do we miss what God is saying to us because of the "noise" in our lives? What have I missed by not straining to hear Him? He is there. Always. We just have to tune our ears to Him, not the noise of the world...which at times is just so LOUD isn't it? And what if we don't strain our ears to hear? We miss it don't we? And those bells...are so lovely. They are perfectly pitched and timed and rhythmic. And the "noise"...well it is NOT. It is loud and harsh and not very ordered. So I was reminded today to LISTEN. Listen for His voice, His leading, His peace. Even if I have to strain to hear it, it is there. Always there. Just like those bells always chime. And what a smile they bring to my heart...unlike the noise of the cars. May you hear the bells today and know He is always there, always wanting to speak to us, always wanting to be heard above the noise.